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Why We Love Children

Discussion in 'General Open/Public Discussion' started by Manitou, 23 Jun 2005.


  1. Manitou

    Manitou Old War Horse DragonWolf

    Got this in an email from Mrs. Mani:


    A small boy is sent to bed by his father.
    Five minutes later....."Da-ad...."
    "What?"
    "I'm thirsty. Can you bring drink of water?"
    "No, You had your chance. Lights out."
    Five minutes later: "Da-aaaad....."
    "WHAT?"
    "I'm THIRSTY. Can I have a drink of water??"
    I told you NO! If you ask again, I'll have to spank you!!"
    Five minutes later......"Daaaa-aaaad....."
    "WHAT!"
    "When you come in to spank me, can you bring a drink of water?"


    An exasperated mother, whose son was always getting into mischief, finally asked him "How do you expect to get into Heaven?"
    The boy thought it over and said, "Well, I'll run in and out and in and out and keep slamming the door
    until St. Peter says, 'For Heaven's sake, Dylan, come in or stay out!'"


    One summer evening during a violent thunderstorm a mother was tucking her son into bed.
    She was about to turn off the light when he asked with a tremor in his voice, "Mommy, will you sleep with me tonight?"
    The mother smiled and gave him a reassuring hug.
    "I can't dear," she said. "I have to sleep in Daddy's room."
    A long silence was broken at last by his shaky little voice:
    "The big sissy." :lol:


    It was that time, during the Sunday morning service, for the children's sermon. All the children were invited to come forward.
    One little girl was wearing a particularly pretty dress and, as she sat down, the pastor leaned over and said, "That is a very pretty dress. Is it your Easter Dress?"
    The little girl replied, directly into the pastor's clip-on microphone, "Yes, and my Mom says it's a bitch to iron."



    When I was six months pregnant with my third child, my three year old came into the room when I was just getting ready to get into the shower. She said, "Mommy, you are getting fat!"
    I replied, "Yes, honey, remember Mommy has a baby growing in her tummy."
    "I know," she replied, but what's growing in your butt?" :rofl:



    One day the first grade teacher was reading the story of Chicken Little to her class. She came to the part of the story where Chicken Little tried to warn the farmer. She read, ".... and so Chicken Little went up to the farmer and said, "The sky is falling, the sky is falling!"
    The teacher paused then asked the class, "And what do you think that farmer said?"
    One little girl raised her hand and said, "I think he said: 'Holy Crap! A talking chicken!'"
    The teacher was unable to teach for the next 10 minutes.



    A certain little girl, when asked her name, would reply,
    "I'm Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter."
    Her mother told her this was wrong, she must say, "I'm Jane Sugarbrown."
    The Vicar spoke to her in Sunday School, and said,
    "Aren't you Mr. Sugarbrown's daughter?"
    She replied, "I thought I was, but mother says I'm not."



    A little girl asked her mother, "Can I go outside and play with the boys?"
    Her mother replied, "No, you can't play with the boys, they're too rough."
    The little girl thought about it for a few moments and asked,
    "If I can find a smooth one, can I play with him?"
     
  2. that is so cute :) i have to ad and this is quite true :) to the thing..

    i was taking my girl scout troop on a hike into the "great" outdoors. (actually it was a nice wooded bike trail) and it smelled of flowers and trees and the river rushing next to it.. one of my girl scouts walks up to me and says "what's that smell?". and i told her, taking a deep breath, "thats nature", and her response, bless her heart was, "well nature stinks!" I am still laughing as i thought that was quite the funniest thing i had heard out of a childs mouth in some time!
     
  3. Om

    Om DragonWolf

    Oh, my turn, my turn!

    Once we were on family vacation at a nice beach resort on TopSail Island, NC, right on the ocean with all of these incredible waterfalls, swimming pools and hot tubs that were sculpted to look like natural stone with plants all around. Coming in after a hard day of play on the beach we all decided to relax a bit in one of the fancy hot tubs. Pistachio had never been in one before. He was 4 at the time and he looked up at me and asked, "Mom, why are we sitting in this flushing toilet?"

    Oh...and once when he was also four I was carrying him around in Victoria's Secret. He looked around and said, "Mom, the big bra's are much better than the little bras. I like the black ones the best. Then a few minutes later a woman walked up to me and pulled up her shirt because she'd forgotten her bra size and wanted me to read it for her. Pistachio said, "Mom, I really like your friend."
     
  4. Brokentusk

    Brokentusk DragonWolf

    Children are great... if they're cooked right.
     
  5. ORANGE

    ORANGE DragonWolf

    hmmmm......a modest proposal......
     
  6. jupe

    jupe Shocklance Ninja DragonWolf

    [​IMG]
     
  7. That's just sick jupe. :rolleyes:

    I was having dinner with the in-laws, when the subject for what Chinese Zodiac each person was came up. My father in-law is a Dragon and announced that. My son Eric looked at him and said, "No Grandpa you're an old Dinosaur."

    :grampi:
     
  8. Manitou

    Manitou Old War Horse DragonWolf

    :rofl:
     
  9. Yes we children are the best thing but sometimes we can be a pain in the butt :) but hey our parents still love us :)
     
  10. i think that is something you can always rest assured Kassa. That us parents will always, no matter what, love our children. We may be dissappointed in them, we may be mad at them, we may want to eat them :) but above it all, a parent has the capacity to forgive and love you unconditionally always and forever :) even when you do not think we do :)
     

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